You know what? Serichu desuka. I am sorry. In finding the opinions of the lady, I found out that it didn’t matter. Talk to her from trance, or to me from Mexico.

[Note: "Serichu desuka" means "I am bleeding" in Japanese, and it is a phrase that I did recognize in this present life, as it was a woman’s way of saying that she had her period. Then, with the phrase "the opinions of the lady didn’t matter" again repeated, we have a further clue as to why I had murdered this husband in a past life. The last sentence implies that I can speak to this former self that did the murder while I was in trance. This did occur in the readings later on.

In the next paragraph, we have a possible contact with that past life as the Japanese female.]

Who are you? I am the one you knew well. Give me a clue and I will feed you more information. Seeing something like this; I am just a walk away. Your thoughts need only incubate for a short time; we will have them. I use your mind to make the connection. Isn’t that strange? I am now aware that there was a constitution passed with bylaws putting up a range of statutes for those people who seek freedom of speech, freedom of thought. You should not stray from these teachings; they will give you peace of mind.

[Note: This is the woman’s way of commenting on the fact that she could see how much more freedom we had in modern America than she did in her time.]

D: [Bathroom trip.]

D: [Thinking about Antonio’s information with regards to UFOs.]

Be careful with me. Some things he "knows" don’t already exist, but there has been contact between our government and extraterrestrials. The significance of the millennium is that our materialist doctrines will be dethroned, and people will understand their true natures as multidimensional beings, free to roam the cosmos. Finding you people is an interesting challenge, and to that end, it is a task that involves great diligence. The localized space-time nexus varies considerably from one moment to the next. It is quite difficult to enter into your reality field.

These experiences will happen as long as you want them to, but we need you to go back to sleep right now for more important reasons that you will find out later on. Peace be with you in the Light of everlasting Love.

 

Monday 2 / 3 / 97 – 6:20 a.m.

There is no one to believe me. It reminds me of when there were pointers in the sky; you could go wherever you wanted. To make classic one’s life involves patience and respect. The place is here; the time is now. Be not dismayed by what is happening.

 

11:30 a.m.

You are on a probable island where many different probabilities exist. [Image of people swimming around.] We would like to say that life is forever, but the implication is that you didn’t see the hurricanes; so calm down and get yourself focused on the tasks at hand. Everything will be coming into focus very soon, and you are aware of that. You are also aware of your shortness of lifetime and shortness of breath, as is Eric. The Japanese culture regulates your world; if you say so, this is an important day in turning everything around. Flooding and baked instruments will not occur this time. The breath of the Divine will not blow you down.

 

Wednesday 2 / 5 / 97 – 7:25 a.m.

Several times a week, you will find that the answers are right in front of you. It’s your choice whether to do anything about that or not. We will help you as it is deemed appropriate, so don’t be afraid; the system of aid is always there around you. Your employment situation is taking a turn for the better. If it were up to us, we would have you going both ways; exploring all the possibilities simultaneously while not failing to include the fact that there are other viable options that you could exercise at any time if you so choose. This, I think, is an extremely important strategy for you to have as you continue forward in this progress. We are aware of how unfortunate it is that you must depend on others, but this is actually an important lesson in your own self-dependency so you will never go down that path again.

Every time someone wants to make a point, it seems that they do it with great force and vigor. Once the point is made, they turn their attention to other matters; therefore, be advised that this too will pass, and you will find yourself in a situation of much greater stability. We realize that this is a humbling experience, and we understand the difficulties it poses in you living your life. Take solace in the fact that it is about to be over.

Once we straighten out your life more, these types of conversations will not be so frequent, for we will no longer have the need to do such things. We can begin working on more global matters. Be forewarned; the dream you had this morning served as a guidepost for you, so that you may realize the enormous dangers that you face if your book reveals too much of the Great Plan. You have seen a similar assault be brought down upon Courtney Brown; such assaults will not cease, as you will also notice that my website was trashed.

For you to involve yourself in matters more pertaining to Earth, we would no longer have a need to put such a stress on these workings. Your focus on the realms of consciousness is getting better, and once this major cycle has ended, there is a lot more that we can do; you should wait and see. Concerning (the place I ended up working at,) the probabilities are good. It is not just 40 dollars a day, but a compound salary.

D: Are there any advisories regarding the future that you might want me to know about?"

Only one – that you maintain peace and happiness in the New Year. That is our greatest wish, and that is what we hope will manifest. You have made significant progress in the way you have handled yourself in this situation; it is a significant step for you to have called everyone involved and let them know what is going on. Before it seems you had too much pride, when it was actually ignorance. Now, you are getting the message.

[Lyrics to a rock song by Soundgarden:] "Black Hole Sun, won’t you come and wash everything away?" It’s not that it’s that old, either. You are unhappy about pollution, but you are going through a cleansing, so you need not worry about the events in your past; merely look to the events in the future and see what will transpire.

Peace be with you in the Light of everlasting Love.

 

Thursday 2 / 6 / 97 – 8:45 a.m.

The negative ends up being very successful. Tell them about the other side. Ten years ago, I didn’t think it was possible; now I have seen that it is a viable system that works repeatedly under many conditions. Therefore, no one should be afraid of this, for it is eminently natural. It’s just a deeper extension of the personal self to the more impersonal self. You already have many interactions of this nature in the dream plane. If you can get yourself to a state where you are almost dreaming in waking life, then it is not much of a stretch to see that you can bring in the same experiences and record them as they happen.

The chapter of the speech about the patriarchy needs some further adjustment. The barriers that one once thought as insurmountable are being loosed from their shackling restraints. Situations where the issue was once solid and irrefutable are now turning around towards the light; and one such example is the symbolism of the fall of OJ [Simpson,] which sort of represents, in general, the light of truth penetrating through institutionalized corruption by male policymakers. These policies of government must be stopped; the position you are in now indicates very strongly that they will be. Therefore, be not afraid as you see the old order crumbling around you, for it is but dust in the wind in terms of the larger picture of things. They will grab their bags and go away from here, packing up to head to a different place where the lessons are more appropriate.

If you went into the past with a better attitude, you might perceive things that initially were not to your liking, in context of seeing how they were important growth lessons at the time, though perhaps not well received. The juxtaposition of these experiences your planet is going through now, when seen after the fact in the context of the modern eye, (currently modern that is,) [will make it] easy to discover the richness and the grandeur of these events despite their magnitude and despite their potential for difficulty in healing. One needs only see beyond the illusions at the front to walk around those and see what awaits beyond this glimpse of wisdom, that glimpse of grandeur which has yet to manifest for many people.

Different peoples in different times utilized systems of communication that involved other methods not similar to yours now. These methods occupied the level of the mass psyche, so that in effect, when one person made a profound realization, it spread to the whole. Such realizations in your time need also be manifested, and that is exactly what is happening. Your entire planet is now in the position where the available spiritual energy for transformative growth has been doubled and redoubled, so that it is a multiplying factor.

Unfortunately, what we are seeing is that many people are not able to handle the energy that is coming in, because of various blockages that they have. And as the energy that naturally courses through their bodies is increased, there is a significant problem with buildups in places that cause tension and pressure. Thus we see a widespread desolation and despair, simply because of the fact that the forces at work in the person’s life are so strong that there is literally no escape for them. They must continue to reduplicate their mistakes again and again, and no real progress is made.

Some people haven’t changed in a long time. It pains us to see how much people are struggling; how difficult it is for them to get right straight through to the core. We always hope for this, and encourage this to happen, but there is only so much that we can do in our position. If the person is unwilling to listen to the forces of their own karma, their dreaming life and various other synchronicities that occur throughout the day, there is really not much else we can do. If they do causative karma, we can certainly bring that in, but they may not perceive that that’s what it is at all.

Many people are starving, and for one reason or another they chose to come back in a place where people are starving so that they may learn the appropriate lessons that they needed to learn.

I will stop right for now and do some personal dictation. ______ is another place that you might want to try. The job with the [direct counseling of troubled] NYC kids seems to be filled with tension, anxiety and stress. You and I both know that this would complicate your life unnecessarily, and therefore, though you may be offered a position, we strongly recommend that you not do so.

 

Saturday 2 / 8 / 97 – 8:00 a.m.

[2] In Kingston there should be a light. We can talk about your own life if you want. I know you are upset; I invented it. The opposite situation has now presented itself to you. Finalizing the decisions will make everything go more smoothly.

It’s special, really special. It fails me to even say something like that. You should be the first one to know you can take your wrench off. There were similar jobs like that in 1989; but you were crazy; your nails cut, chopped, you were starved. You had no money and no direction. But now, you have gloves on, and the streets are full. It is a couple days old now, but it hasn’t settled in yet.

[Note: I had started my new job at a residential care facility for the developmentally disabled at this point. The "wrench" they are referring to appears to be my feelings of struggle in the workplace. I did not have a job in 1989 as I was going through a great deal of personal problems at the time, as the reading says here. Then, when they say that I now have my "gloves on," it means that I am ready to do some real work.]

As for the houses, I don’t care, as long as I feel it’s safer. [Image of a man at a desk laughing – persists until end of this paragraph.] You have [been] crying all by yourself. What can we do with UFOs but repeat them? Look, I don’t carry these things. I would be joking, but our assistant manager doesn’t. He’s an unarmed white senior.

[Note: This seems to be the readings’ attempt at humor.]

So when you were five and younger than she, there’s a big bad wolf came to your door. [Image of black guy telling me this.]

[Note: This is obviously about My OBE.]

All I’ve got to say is good luck and God bless you – drive carefully. If you’d like to be in an accident, we can arrange that. You’re good to go; I realize that’s not part of your experience anymore. As a matter of fact, we warn people about that.

[4] Different times lead to different things. The opposite side is more complicated; other problems, other situations arise which may cause extreme stress and handicaps. Different people approach problems, different situations in ways their own. Your approach should most nearly mirror that of the deepest adepts and gurus. The way I see it is that there are too many things going on which require your patience right now. You need to keep them all active and give your energy to not one of them, but to yourself, so that the energy does not become entangled in other matters that are really unimportant to you.

You can get along in a state of mind that precludes the ambiance of suffering and desolation. You can move forward into a greater understanding of the whole of which you are a part; simply be ready to get off that chair and let people know that there is a deeper side to this whole issue. They must realize that other people in other times of history have also come to these same truths much in the same way that you now are. Understand that these historical periods possess an intuition and a knowingness all their own which cannot be duplicated in the present time, because of its long-standing virtue and uniqueness.

[Image of Western-style leather stuff.] [Note: This could be a reflection of Cayce’s past life as John Bainbridge, based on the context below.]

The holes of your past in the pattern cause a great deal of trauma. These painkillers often exist through to the present, where they are painfully duplicated in experiences that occur later on in life. The wider the downpour, the deeper the flood; in this case, you were able to stave off the flood in record time [by getting your new job.] We are very proud of that fact, but also understand that it is our policy to insure that you and everyone else goes through these experiences with a feeling of wonderment and awe so that there is no deviation from these feelings of joy. Once that state is reached, your spiritual work will become much more effective, and you will find yourself in a place of great joy and beauty, and behold it for everyone to see.

I am not saying that you should run around and cause any trouble; you have learned your lessons and there is no need to reduplicate them. I just want to let you know for now that something wonderful is happening in your life, and there is no reason to be afraid of it. If anything, it should become the best thing that has happened to you so far, as you move into a state where you are then acknowledging your own wealth. This is the most that we can hope for you, and we will do what we can to bring it to fruition.

If people are lying to me, it causes me a great deal of distress. Your lies include: the dishes, the sink, the toilet, the car, the Elting Library, the fish, supermarket, testing. All of the things mentioned here and others indicate areas of problematic developments for you; it would be in your best interest to learn how to stifle off these influences so that they may not pose a problem in the future.

[Note: All of the words mentioned were indeed connected directly to my problems, which I had already promised myself in the higher sense that I would solve. I needed to do my dishes and not leave them in the sink, I needed to clean out the toilet, pay for my car bills, return my books to the library, and buy fish at the supermarket to enhance my protein levels. The only word that I didn’t understand is "testing."]

Everyone will have similar problems to you, but in order for you to become helpful in the matter that you claim you want to be helpful, it is necessary for you to understand these principles and apply them. [You should do this] so that we may both experience a wider breadth of experience as we go forward through the reincarnational cycle together, and your fragment reunites with the deeper part, which is me.

As for Chan, this new apartment [up the street from you] is better for her purposes. It’s two times a week [you will see her now, instead of every day.] The new moon is approaching; it is a time when things are mellowing out and you can begin new projects. We urge you to consider the advancements that are possible for your future. We urge you to put energy into starting the procedures that will lead to these advancements in the present moment.

There is something that might help you, and that is the knowledge of the truths that are present in your sphere. [Image of people carrying boxes.] Many people are unaware of the degree to which karma is operating, quite beyond their own naturalistic abilities to control it. You must remember, I, from your point of view, that this realization alone can be stunning and outrageous for a person once they really, truly understand its ramifications. So, we caution you that when you are trying to help other people, you justifiably need to be five notches lower than that which you normally would discuss in the present moment. Carrie may have benefited from your metaphysical training, but now she is going and getting drugs for her depression. [Image of people smoking.] Even in this case, some of your advice was too metaphysically oriented to be of practical use, because the understanding of the intellect is often not transferred through to the ego.

In regards to your computer and my writing, a sample of my writing has been provided here. We see that you will be able to fix the computer, so that should not be a big concern on your mind; it will happen tonight. [Note: Actually, My housemate Jack was busy that night, and it took three nights to track me down.] We urge you to transcribe these things, especially the more recent ones, as information is readily available which relates to your future that you will need to download and decode. The best way you can do this is by putting it all to writing.

D: [Moves his leg out of the normal position.]

It sounds good, but this leg position breaks the trance. Did you have a question, David? [Long pause – I don’t know what to ask.] There’s three separate voices here, so you do have a choice as to which one you want. The issues of your past exist in my now, and that should help you when you are considering them. Your "alien abduction experiences" occurred through dream contacts, and they were not abductions in the least. The part that you have forgotten is what happens AFTER you see the UFO’s – that is the secret information that awaits you. There was more. [Image of a very white-light room with people talking to me.]

D: I’d like you to speak of what happened to me when I was five, and use whatever paradoxes are necessary for the information to get through.

At that time, a sanctimonial testimonial might not have done you much good. There is something more; something that you are not now aware of. There was a further journey; you have accurately discerned this. We would help you remember, but this is something you must do on your own. Hypnosis might be of assistance, I am not sure. It seems a lot easier for everyone else once you realize that your plane is booked and you are ready for the flight. These inspirational messages you were given as a child were to prepare you for the experiences that you are now going through. As you uncover old programming, you realize the extent to which your presence here is imbued with a certain energy that permeates through to all aspects of your existence. There is to a certain degree a [measure of] predestiny in that a lot of force and energy was invested into you by me, this higher part of yourself and others who are also affiliated with you from your moment of birth and on through. Therefore, right at conception, you were designed to be a teacher, a bringer of light.

In order to make of yourself what it is that you truly want, it is necessary for you to go through symbolic deaths and rebirths. You have chosen these for yourself, and the one that has now occurred [with the loss of your past job] was the least painful of all of them so far. They have only seemed more substantial in recent years and months because of the fact that your situations were not paid for, and it became an issue of finances as well as emotions. You should realize that you have gone through similar crises in the past, and the financial situation just presents it in the light more directly relative to yourself, which is less evident when dealing in situations where other people are a factor.

So, right now your most immediate concern is to become grounded and centered in the new reality that has presented itself, so that you may understand that the opportunity is wide open, and that there is no need for you to fret or panic anymore. We want you to be absolutely content with each moment of your life as you move through it. By you completely living in the moment and being at peace with yourself, it enables us to do these workings, and if not for that fact, we could never have done what we are now doing today.

Therefore, we want you to understand that the deeper you go into your mind, and the more you can focus on this, the more work we can do with you and the quicker we can advance you through the cycles of existence that now present themselves to you. Therefore, we ask that you simply be at peace with yourself and with the situations that have transpired so that you may not have the pain and the agony of your past. Veritably, you may decide to never choose this again, as it no longer has a hold over you. There is no reason for you to do so.

The rest of your life, no matter what the conditions, may not ever approach the degree to which you are in trouble in the present moment, and you have a choice as to whether or not that occurs. Peace be with you in the Light of everlasting Love.

 

8:55 a.m.

D: [After food, bathroom & water]

[2] "We were lucky; I didn’t see a thing, but I knew there was something going on."

Whoever said that [last sentence] to you was just a beginner; it was beginner’s luck. Antonio didn’t say that to you, or if he did, he didn’t mention anything to me about it, in the dream plane, you know.

[4] These constant values of experience, these constant amounts of understanding are always existing in the background. It is only the degree to which you open up, the degree to which you can strip off the layers that cover them, [that allows you to] realize them in the present moment. Many others have tried these practices, and have reached a certain point that satisfied their ego and where they had sporadic accuracy, similar to some of the things that have happened to you, and that by itself caused them to become happy with the situation. We recognize that you have a desire to improve upon these things that you are doing, and we like that fact.

[Image of a sphere in the air.] It is important to us that we both work together, and the best way we can do that is for you to have a job which you can enjoy and which can keep your life stable for the moment until the wider manifestations approach. Your positioning with [your new job] is good, and as you saw with the speedometer synchronicity that so astounded you, the energy is ripe on this one.

[Note: My speedometer hit 128888.8 as I pulled into the parking lot for my interview at my new job. Since I synchronized my odometer with the triple digits as well, by clearing it to 0000 when there was a triple number on top, each one of these synchronicities was even more impressive, because there would be a bank of numbers on both the speedometer and odometer.]

It was the best situation we could find for you, and it is a significant improvement over [your last job,] so you should be happy about that; but we know that the happiness will come when you start getting your checks! The real work begins with you; you have to take the initiative to want to grow, and you must guard against despondency with very intense focus. As you have now seen through working with Chan, despondency is enormously destructive and can cause untold problems.

[Note: Chan was almost always depressed while she stayed at our place.]

By day, you are a crusader for truth, and by night you are a worker for Light. This is a nice arrangement. I’ll arrange it so that you can’t see the problems [with your new job] right away; we want you to be happy, we want you to acclimate.

[Note: I didn’t realize exactly what this sentence meant until the job was well underway.]

It is important that you hide your true nature through clever games of listening to other people and approaching them on their side. The most difficult trouble that you will have is with the dinners [that they serve there.] We suggest that you say that you are a vegetarian, and don’t make a big point of [your avoidance of] sugar. When you are offered it, say that you don’t want it, and if pressed for detail say that you are hypoglycemic. It is this indication of your strict diet that in the beginning makes people feel that you are separate from them, and that they cannot understand or relate to you. You want to approach people on the most grounded physical level possible, so be as tactful as you can in the food situation.

At other times in your life, we have wondered about what might happen if we were to begin this process, but we now know that this was the most appropriate time, and it is working for you quite well. This pleases us, and we want you to know that it is not too late; you have not overrun some special goal that we had for you, or that you had for you. We want you to understand that this is a present issue.

The classroom is going to laugh at me while I am talking to you, because they need to realize that there are so many factors at work when I am doing this with you that it becomes quite hilarious. Let us both now agree that 8:00 will the time of the highest energy peaks for this working. At least until your schedule changes, we will strive for this time repeatedly.

 

Sunday 2 / 9 / 97 – 8:52 a.m.

You know what? Alzheimer’s kind of sucks. Sometimes, people just put whatever they want into their bodies, and they forget about what their body really needs. Most of the food, 99 percent of the time, lacks in important ways. With all the different things to do including shopping and the kids, it can sort of get pushed to the side. We would caution anyone who reads these transcripts to be acutely aware of how important strict diet really is. You know how cute babies are. You can feed them, you don’t have to restrict them. That determines what else will happen. If he doesn’t like it, that’s okay.

[2] Yes, you are Amigo. Insufficient dollars – cigarettes. They’re terrible. As much as I love families and kids, I hate to see these things; there’s something about it that just bothers me down to the core.

[Note: What comes soon after this point is a very substantial revelation concerning another one of my past lives that was not mentioned in the Cayce readings. This life again featured me as a female. (Notice that Cayce was not female in any of my quoted past lives except once as a girl who died at age five.) My then current housemate Antonio, from Spain, was my husband in that past life. Apparently Antonio gave his then-wife a baby and then went off to fight in a war and was killed. We can see this starting to come out in the lines, "you know how cute babies are," "You are Amigo," and "I hate to see these things." Antonio also smoked cigarettes, which could explain their being mentioned in this paragraph. The rest of the story is explained further below.]

I knew this girl was going to make it; she was hospitalized in the 1770’s. [Italian accent -] They bought a lot of fish; they wondah who she is. She was upset about that.

[Note: Although the date is probably wrong and does not line up with the Cayce cosmology, we can see more puzzle pieces here. If the date was actually supposed to be the 1670’s, this could be in reference to Cayce’s short incarnation as the "love child" in the French royal court. Antonio might have been part of that court in that lifetime as well.]

[Note: Here, the readings go back into commenting about my present job, and on how few people are really willing to take care of these people.]

Lunch was a sandwich and a seizure; definitely not a question of eating too much. The things their families would say to you would be tasty. All I know is I needed a job and it was offered to me; no wonder they have only seven people [on their staff.] These jobs are hard; it’s not the thought that counts, it’s the mental anguish. The physical labor can at times be very demanding, but you have done well and we are proud of that. Be aware of the solvents and the air conditioners. In this environment, you can take more of a leadership role; an active, constructive stance. You shouldn’t talk an awful lot about the things your coworkers are doing wrong. It gets harder to work between two people when there’s that tension in the air.

Actually no, there’s not going to be vegetarians there; you’ll have to figure that one out on your own. Do not feed [the residents,] or they will lose the skill; a non-vacation skill. You are naturally responsive to what is going on around you; therefore, it is important that you keep your mind clear at this job. If you can get others to agree to turn off the TV, that would be great.

[Voice tone gets lighter.] I’ll see what the problem is; you’ve got the mustard. You should fill out your tax forms so you can get the money; consider that another job. You are out of range, but we are still with you. Peace be with you in the Light of everlasting Love.

 

Monday 2 / 10 / 97 – 8:22

If you can piece together a story, that’s one thing, but the contacts you will make will last forever. Take my word for it; I was given the same advice when I was at your relative point that you are now. It is the power of thought that is called into question – when all else fails, it is the only recourse that can be looked at. Different people are going to approach it in different ways depending on their ages, and many other factors.

Just ask for help when you need it. The teacher is coming to let you know that you can trust everything that is happening. Climb out of my mouth into a new understanding; it is legitimate. The out of body experience beckons. Pay special attention to some of the beings in situations that will await you when you do this, for it is important that you don’t get trapped in lower astral realms; very important. Your personality grows at a rate inversely proportional to the degree of pot you smoke in the figurative and literal plane. It seems there is a fear of laughing and a fear of life. It’s unfortunate, for we see that there are many other ways to behave that would be more in accordance with your highest dreams and aspirations.

[4] These ways we speak of are easily attainable in the Now for you; it is only up to you to recognize them, so that you may be free from the constraints that have held you in the past and rise on forward to a new understanding devoid of the limiting blockages that have held you. These appurtenances show themselves in various ways, and it is up to you to reveal their composition. Be advised that there is another path that can be taken, which illustrates the degree of depth of experience that can be realized while still in a physical body. This path hinges on the idea of the direct experience of the individual. That is what we want for you.

[Images and thoughts of paying all my bills and my landlady.] Our needs indicate that this is top priority, so we advise you to treat it with seriousness; this is not an issue that can be brushed aside. You are going to need money before you actually will get it. The last time you did something like this, you just said, "F— the bills," and that isn’t proper at this point either. Focus on the situation that presents itself now, and just deal with it day by day; that is the best you can do.

The intricate seven. That is a concept and an idea that you must energize and make real; the seven chakras in your body, of course. Even now, there remain some blockages.

The classroom has taught you well; now you must go on from there. It’s like in West Side Story, when an evolution of the soul is reached and a profound shift is effected between the two warring factions of the personality; the ego and superconscious. The symbolic death is necessary in order to ascend to a higher space. Freedom can be annexed by those with the power to change what happens moment by moment.

[Note: I feel that what they are referring to with West Side Story is the fact that the play was about an interracial relationship that developed between Caucasians and Puerto Ricans. At the end of the play is a very intense and heartfelt plea for the races to unite and stop the violence against each other. They are obviously expanding the metaphor here even more into the idea of the reunification of parts of the human psyche that stand in disagreement.]

Here, Dave, we want you to see some of the realities inherent in our plane; these include searching, opening up, discovering, renewing, becoming, experiencing, living, challenging, et cetera. Many times in the past you have wanted to be granted access to our realm, and we are excited as you are now preparing to make the jump. It is going to happen in the near future, so be not afraid. As the man in the book said, fear is the largest barrier to you being able to utilize this technique, so just go with it, and you’ll find out that you are ready for a big ride.

 

Wednesday 2 / 12 / 97 – 9:30 a.m.

The moral and spiritual decline of society greatly upsets you. Don’t say you’re sorry. [Image of talking to one of the residents.] Don’t say you dislike everything here [at your job;] it’s not so bad. [Thinking about gloves for diapers, then about one of the employees discussing her being "saved."] She is here now, and above these in some way. The necessity comes with distance and practice. It is unnecessary to unleash the forces of nature upon these situations without knowing what you are going into first. How are you doing?

Spanish Spaniards. If you really hate TV that much, then don’t watch it. It’s on the table now, so don’t feel like you can’t do it. The answers you are waiting for are there, and there is no other way for it to be. Veritably, it can be said that you are ready for a massive change; feelings of inadequacy from your past are dissipating. Feelings of not being able to do a good job or of not wanting to do a good job are also dissipating.

Now in payment for our poison ivy, we can raise another saving voice. You convince me of what I’ll want, and then battleships are sent out.

[Note: This last sentence is in reference to a bad case of poison ivy that I contracted twice in 1996. The first time was extraordinarily bad, affecting a large area of the right side of my back and butt, and the second time was caused by my shoes and basically stayed on my knees. This seems to be saying that once I clear my own karma and do the work on myself, better phases of my life will be immediately forthcoming.]