[Note: The time period for April 97 Section One is depressingly bereft of dreams and / or readings that have anything other than personal content. I was very much engrossed with trying to jam-pack seven books worth of electronics knowledge into my brain, and I stopped transcribing my tapes or being interested in this process. Therefore, we have just tried in this section to "salvage" the best of what was available, and that will explain the number of days that are unaccounted for.]
Monday 4 / 8 / 97 – morning
D: I was interrupted in the morning by my neighbor W’s boyfriend, who I had blocked in. I lost all my dreams. He was knocking at the door many times before I came to the door. Later on in the day, I asked the cards if I shouldn’t go to the E electronics shop, and I got The Lovers, indicating that I shouldn’t, that it was a good decision. Last night on the telephone with Carrie, she asked me to draw a card at random, and I drew the Queen of Pentacles, and I had just been talking about that very card with her on the telephone. That obviously showed us both that synchronicity was at work. Today, when I came up into my room totally on a whim, it was 2:22 when I was filling out all of my tax forms!
I just asked if it was okay to eat the tofu hot dogs, and I got Queen of Wands and Ace of Wands, which seemed to be pretty much of a go – ahead.
[Note 9/23/97: If the research about TV radiation suppressing psychic functions and inducing depression and lethargy is true, that could very well explain why I got into my most distorted period of all when I was working at E. While working there, I was literally surrounded by walls of televisions that were up and running! I notice how little dictation there is at this point. Not only that, but I completely had gravitated away from wanting to do this psychic work in order to learn the electronics trade so I could have a stable, new source of income. While I was there I was getting horrible karmic repercussions from thinking that I could go in this direction and neglecting my spirit. This included deep gashes in my hands from screwdrivers that slipped, and spilling horrible chemical solvents on myself and my clothes. I was also freezing my ass off from H’s lack of desire or money to heat the building, and needing to wear a sweater and a jacket.]
Tuesday 4 / 9 / 97 – 9:25 p.m.
I was interacting with a toucan or flamingo outside of the Schoolhouse; it was pink, but it also was colored like a toucan and had this big beak; it also had these big muscleman arms like the Hulk. Essentially, it was human except for the head. It was opposite where the mailboxes were. It was very hungry, and someone was telling me that they didn’t like it when those birds showed up, because they ate everything. It was a very weird thing.
[Note: This is included for the archive because it clearly depicts one of the "things" that Ra-Ta chose to heal in the Atlantean period. According to the Cayce Readings, during that time there were a great deal of half human, half-animal monstrosities created by spiritual beings projecting themselves into the bodies of animals and getting "stuck."]
After my first encounter with the toucan, I went back to the house and continued to focus on what I was doing. I was building a store out of the Schoolhouse, a business I was running out of my apartment. There was someone pulling into the driveway, and at first I thought it was Greg C, but then I realized that it was another guy. He pulled in, and I knew that he needed to build this construction outside, and it seemed to be related to the business that I was starting somehow. One thing leads to another, and I thought that the toucan was hungry. He had some pink lemonade, so he went down and tried to give the toucan a drink. The big beak was weird, as it bit me several times lightly.
All of a sudden, the toucan went away and came back as a semi – long haired gray cat, sort of like one of E F’s. I tried to give the water to the gray cat, and it just kept stuffing its face into the glass maniacally, like it was dehydrating to death. It was almost attacking the water, trying to drink it so fast. I was wondering why the animal was so starved.
After this part with the cat, these boards were all laid out in this linear sequence, and this guy was going to try to build something, and I felt like I might be able to help him.
IMPORTANT NOTE: New transcription from this point starting 6/2/98. For some reason I had neglected to finish transcribing this area for all this time. I guess it had to do with how depressed I was in this time period.
This was the guy I thought was Greg at first, and he very naturally morphed into Andy R and / or the keyboardist kid I met from my job at E. The next thing I know, the building that had only been a foundation of boards a moment earlier had suddenly become this towering structure. Simultaneously, my brother appeared, and he was not at all in a good state of mind; he was crying and needed my help very badly. He was totally overwhelmed with academics, and that was where an idea about moving first got started. It might have been academics, or possibly related to my mother’s move to Florida, but I was joking around, telling people that I was going to be making a trip to Massachusetts.
He was very, very fearful, and seemed that he needed to be taken care of. He was scared of us going up into this tall building, and of the academics that would be involved. At the end I was telling Andy and these guys that I was going to Massachusetts because I wanted to see the environment out there, where everybody plays their instrument. I was saying how I could go for the tourist trap and everything, and we were joking about it. I was telling them that I would enjoy the beaches. It was like a big joke to me, and I then said that I could go to Provincetown to see the gays, just to enhance the joke even more. Everybody laughed.
[Note: Before we see the ways in which this was related to my life at that time, let me say this. I can now see that so soon after I broke off from Ellenbogen and the possibility of getting into Mohonk became stronger, the plans for the move to Virginia Beach were already being seeded into my subconscious mind. I would never have believed it at the time, and thus you can see in the dream how I treated the whole idea of moving like a big joke. The tall building that arose out of the business that I was forming, which was related to my true academic interests, was a clear foreshadowing of how important this work that I am doing would turn out to be in the future. I could never have imagined this at that point; it was the farthest possible thing from my mind.]
D: GREAT SYNCHRONICITY! Directly after saying this I went to the bathroom, and in a deep state of trance I realized that the dream had to be about my mother. I was sitting on the toilet thinking that I had to call her. As I thought this, the phone started ringing, and I got a very strange feeling. I knew that if it was her on the phone, this would chalk up as a very powerful synchronicity. I walked into the other room and discovered that it was her! She indicated to me, in relation to the toucan symbolism, that she had just found pictures of her old boyfriend P in the last few days, and this had dredged up all of these old feelings about it. P always identified himself with the toucan because of his big nose. In relation to the cat symbolism, my mother said that she was having to put Mandy to sleep because she was dying and could not drink anything anymore. Apparently the only thing she could put into her stomach was whipped cream.
[Note: Mandy the cat did not die, and it was intravenous re-hydration, suggested by Mom’s boyfriend at the time, that probably saved her life. She is still alive as I prepare this material for publication in Aug of 1999. I was told nothing about the "Mandy problem" before I got this dream.]
Friday 4 / 12 / 97 – 8:00 a.m.
[Note: This following material for April was not transcribed until over an entire year later, in June 1998.]
Suddenly he hears something, or sees something, and then he can’t see anything. [Image of Mars.] There are many ways to study psychology, huh? Project this as knowledge.
[Note: This seems to be about how I had been doing a really fine job of receiving the transmissions earlier, but at this point I had largely fallen away from it.]
Project what you talk about. Don’t just think about it, be aware of it. Don’t just think, act. You have earned yourself a pat on the back. We kindly agree that success has been reached in the present. Does that surprise you?
[Note: This almost seems time-encoded as well, here in June of 1998. It is a very current and very personal message. It was as if they knew that I was so buried that I would just start transcribing my tapes from a new starting point and allow this one to fall into the cracks. By finally finishing this transcription, and only once all the secrets were fully revealed, I now feel that this is a message that is encoded to fit my present situation.]
D: Was thinking about how one of E F’s articles got famous.
If you believe it, sign it. This is where you must begin; all other paths begin with the first step. When you are coughing or anything of that nature, we will abide by you. There is no need to worry. The big bear of your past, the heat seeking; do you really need that? You have punished yourself quite enough.
In other matters, we are pleased that you have referred to us in an article that you wish to publish. This is a very large part of your dharma now.
[Note: Well, at the point of transcription here, none of this could be more accurate. Yesterday my ARE contact gave me the whole format of how you sell a book to a publisher, complete with addresses to do it with. There is definitely some sort of parallel cycle of time that is going on here!]
There are kings and vagabonds, so you don’t have to worry. I am your source self, that which is within and that which is without.
[6/2/98: Amazingly, this is yet another statement that is time encoded to my present moment. One of Cayce’s past lives was as King David, and another was John Bainbridge, a big alcoholic. This was a big clue at a very early stage in the game Ã